January 9, 2009

January 9, 2009

Last day. Thank god.

Well, yesterday we hung out here at the hotel. I sat up in the balcony and did my homework because my sunburn was killing me. And then I painted a bowl and frog. We all went to Habanero’s last night for dinner. It was pretty good. Today mom, Meryl, Oma, and I went into town in the morning to do a little bit of shopping. Then we all went to a really nice beach, we went swimming and I tanned, but didn’t get much. Then we went to the sea glass beach. We came back to the hotel and had dinner. We sat by the fire and had a cake to celebrate Susie’s birthday next week and Uncle Pat graduating. Um, not for me for getting my license because it’s not as important as those things. What the fuck ever. I was pretty pissed tonight along with Eddie and Meryl. We sat in our room complaining about the family and how Phoebe is turning into a really big bitch. But whatever. I’m so fucking glad we’re going home tomorrow!

Ava Estelle

Present day me: This was the year when these family vacations started to become less enjoyable. I do remember feeling unappreciated by my grandparents and aunts and uncles on this side of the family. Maybe I should have spoken up for myself, in hindsight, but I was very shy back then. When it came to standing up for myself, I didn’t know how to do so, especially with family members who were older than me. In my mind they knew best. I just vented to my siblings about any frustrations.

January 7, 2009

January 7, 2009

Wednesday

Beach/in the city day

This morning Meryl, Phoebe, Aunt Blanche, Uncle Pat, Meredith, Susie, and I went to a public beach. It was really nice, we could go swimming, but I didn’t because there were stingrays flopping around and jumping out of the water. I found a ton of sea glass. Mostly little pieces but they’re so pretty. Then we went into town to pick up everyone else from fishing. They had caught marlin and derado. We ate them for lunch. The dorado was better. We walked through the harbor and then changed into different clothes. We walked to Sammy Hagar’s bar – Cabo Wabo. And took some pictures. Then walked back to the car. And went back to the beach from this morning. So, Oma could go shelling. I found a ton more sea glass. We came back and went to bed.

G’night.

<3 Ava Estelle

Present day me: I remember feeling the absolute coolest going to Cabo Wabo. It was empty when we visited so we just took some cool pictures and relished the place. I was so excited to show others where I’d visited.

January 5, 2009

January 5, 2009

Monday

We all went into town today and ate at the Baja Brewery Co. it was pretty good food. And we went shopping. I got yellow flip flops and a black with white flowers dress that I’m going to wear in Hawaii!!! Yeah. It’s like 4pm and we all just got back. It was still overcast today. And at the moment it’s raining in Ecuador so that’s good. I’m so excited! I hung out with Meredith and Susie most of the day. They’re pretty fun. Meredith kept coming up to me and singing, “sitting on tiki man’s hand” yeah. We took pictures with one of the tiki men last night and took videos of us singing that. I hope the sun comes out tomorrow. I need to tan. Badly. Meryl, Eddie and I got these really good popsicles. I’m guess they were strawberry. And I don’t know what else to write so g’bye.

<3 Ava Estelle

Present day me: the tiki man we were referring to was a statue in an area of the hotel we were staying at. This wasn’t an actual person we interacted with. It’s a fun memory and a cute thing to sing when it’s cousins who only got to see each other once a year, during these family trips.

November 29, 2008

November 29, 2008

Saturday

These past few days were Thanksgiving break. It was alright. We went down to Oma and Opa’s on Wednesday. We just arrived and hung out and went to bed. The next day was thanksgiving. Meryl, Eddie and I went swimming and we had dinner. It was really good. There was only 8 of us. We went for a walk and hung out again. Mom, dad and Eddie went to the Phillips that night. Meryl and I stayed because Opa was taking us to the mall and Oma picked us up. So, we went to the mall on Black Friday. Wasn’t very busy. I got a new sweatshirt from Aeropostale, we got a twilight shirt and Queen shirt. Colorful mascara, aviators! Yeah, Oma took us to the Phillips, and we just hung out there. Us four girls were there most of the day together and we all got along, and it was good.

Then we left this morning, got home, unpacked, and went to rent a movie.

<3 Ava Estelle

Present day me: I was so lucky to have grandparents with a house that had an indoor pool. It was great to be able to go swimming to get away from all of the adults. I also find it so crazy that a mall on black Friday in 2008 wasn’t that busy….

September 19, 2008

September 19, 2008

Friday 9:48pm

So today was the football game against both of the high schools, and I couldn’t go. Aunt Bea, Uncle Gill and Preston came to the cabin this weekend. Grr, I was so mad, mom was lenient on it, but dad wasn’t at all.

So yesterday after school right at 3 o’clock I had an interview at Michael’s for a job as a cashier. It lasted an hour, it went really well, I think. I had to fill out a personal survey and that took me like 20 minutes. So, after that I just interviewed by a really nice, laid back lady. Everyone there was really nice and chill. I told her about how much I love scrapbooking and everything in the store. I also shared about the upcoming vacations in January and March. I was planning on going to Wal-Mart to pick up my pictures, but dad said he’d take me today. Did he? No. Another reason why I was pissed at him today.

Anyway, dad picked me up from school today. Took me home and I packed up. Eddie got home and I got to drive to the motel Aunt Bea and Uncle Gill are staying at. We met them there then showed them the way here.

Basically, all we’ve done is give them the tour, talked, ate dinner and Meryl and I went for a walk. Oh! And Eddie took me for a ride on Aaron’s trail. Yeah, pretty much boring here. I wish I could have gone to the game.

G’night.

<3 Ava Estelle

Present day me: This entry is cathartic as a glimpse of my life when I had to do what my parents wanted me to do, to make the family happy rather than spend time with my friends at the high school football game.

July 27, 2008

July 27, 2008

Sunday 9:43pm

So today dad woke me up by kicking at my leg at 7:30 in the morning. We had to go over to Uncle Charlie and Aunt Ivy’s house for the after-the-golf-outing-breakfast. We talked about the outing and how everything went and then drove home.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Woke up at Uncle Charlie and Aunt Ivy’s house. Mom, Aunt Ivy and Meryl and I went to the new Cabela’s store. Mom wanted to buy some chocolate covered espresso beans. We went out for lunch at cousins subs. Then went back to their house. Dad, Uncle Charlie and I played a few games of cribbage. Then we left to go to the Phillips’. I got to drive Aunt Ivy over there, because the kids and moms were going to the fair. So, we get there and Meryl and I just walk around the fair and people watch. We don’t know anyone there. So, I text Topanga and tell her we’re at the fair and she should come and hang out with us. So, she shows up and I walk around the park with her and she tells me pretty much all about her life. We probably walked a total of three miles. Then we met up with mom and everyone and went on some rides. That was really fun! We went on a giant swing and then a ride like the screaming eagle at MOA. Then the tilt o whirl. It was really cool to hang out with Topanga again. We walk over by the stage and listen to the band play a few songs then walk around some more and leave. When we were in the van on the way home, I let Meryl listen to a voicemail I got the night before, it sounded like Gayle left it. But it was a private number. Linda asked me what we were listening to, and I told her someone had prank called me last night and I couldn’t understand what they were saying. I looked at Gayle as I said that and she was smiling really big, so I’m pretty sure it was her. So, we get back to the Phillips’ and have some food. We talked for a little while and then went to bed. Meryl and I slept on the floor in Linda’s room. Neither Gayle or Linda slept in the same room as us.

Friday July 25, 2008

Pretty much watched movies all day. After the parents went to the fair to see COLLECTIVE SOUL! Gayle asked us three girls if we’d want to bike into town to go to the coffee corner. Another girl from the neighborhood came with too. So, we bike into town and on the way in Gayle and this girl bike over to Bailey’s house to have her come too. So, me, Linda, and Meryl just go straight to the coffee place. They show up and all order smoothies. And Meryl and I didn’t order anything. I wanted to bike over to our old neighborhood where we used to live. So, the three of us went and biked over the hill to the park and hung out there for a while. Then biked to a gas station to get some band aids because Meryl cut her foot while we were there. Dad called me and let me listen to SHINE by Collective Soul. It was really awesome. It was wavy and tinny sounding. But still cool to listen to them live. So, we bike back to their house and want to go swimming. So, we all get our suits on except Gayle. And we’re standing in the kitchen, Gayle tells us her grandma said we can’t go swimming because we’ll get overheated or a leg cramp. What kind of bullshit is that? Just Gayle being in control. So, we change into our pjs and decide to run around outside. But Gayle escapes to the neighbor girl’s house right after she said we’ll all play night games. We go over there and try to get them to come out, but they come back to Gayle’s house and sit inside, so us kids are like, messing with them through the window.

Well, we just end up watching Fool’s Gold. The neighbor girl never said one word while I was around her. And every time I looked at her she looked like she was about to cry. So, we watch the movie and go to bed. Linda ended up sleeping in her room with us so that was good.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Golf Outing Day!

Got up at 6am, way too early for me! I almost fell asleep while I was taking a shower. Got ready and dad took us three kids to burger king for breakfast. We got to the golf course and basically Meryl and I hung out together and took some pictures. My camera broke again so we had to use Meryl’s which only held about 15 photos. So, after everyone golfed and ate dinner/lunch and did the raffle prizes. I won a free 18 hole for 4 players certificate and traded for a bag ball game. After the raffle prizes were done dad drove us three back to the Phillips. Linda and their grandma were the only one’s there. So, I pretty much watched tv for the rest of the night, I was so tired. At about 11 I decided to go to bed, so I laid down and took my phone out to check for any new stuff. And there was a new voicemail from a private number. They said their name was Michael and they saw my myspace picture and thought we should go out. He gave me his number, so I texted it. Found out that he’s the guy Gayle likes – and I’m pretty sure she set him up to it. Even though when she got home, she told me she didn’t do it. But whatever. If I get another “private” call again I’m calling the police or I’m going to make Tabitha send her a mean text message. G’night!

Ava Estelle

Present day me: This was definitely a buried memory until I read this entry again. Wow. Getting creepy voicemails from a private number was how people pranked each other back then! Also, it was really cool to read about hanging out with Topanga. My family lived in this town where Gayle and Linda live. We moved a few hours away and would come back and visit a few times a year. Topanga was one of my first friends of my life.

July 22, 2008

July 22, 2008

Tuesday around 11am.

Just woke up at about 10, took a shower and came out here, to sit in the sun and maybe get a little tanner. I’m listening to Love is Like Oxygen….. I haven’t heard this song in so long. It brings me back to before the whole past year. Before I met Aaron, before Gram died, before I got my temps and my mom pestering me to get a job and more money, before I got bad grades in school because of the stupid family vacation being scheduled for review for finals time. It brings me back to before freshman year. And now it’s ending.

So, now the real reason I’m writing in here this early in the morning and nothing has happened yet today. Last night I went online and in the status for Tori it said “is with Aaron right now and more than happy” I went on his myspace because it said he updated profile information and Tori had written like three paragraphs about who Aaron is and how amazing he is. So, I know now the relationship is serious. I got kind of sad, but I didn’t want to call anyone. They don’t want to hear me complain about someone who I’ve liked forever and said more than once that I’m over him. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to get over him. I just wish I had another guy I could hang out with.

So last night I was thinking about all this, and I thought of writing Aaron a note about my feelings for him. I’m not going to give it to him, it’ll just be in here for me to read, it might help me get over him faster. So here it goes.

Dear Aaron,

I’ve had a crush on you for a really long time now. When I first met you when your dog chased my cat down my driveway, and you rode your bike over and talked to me and my sister and brother I thought you were really nice and cute. So, when I had that party in November 2007, I was really excited you came over and talked to me and my friends. And as I was hanging out with you more and getting to know you better, I thought we’d maybe go out or something. But maybe I got scared or something because I didn’t really talk to you much anymore and I saw you go down to Tori’s a few times. I was getting sad, I felt like I didn’t want our friendship to end just because you had a girlfriend down the street. So, when you came over in the summer when we had friends up, I had a better understanding of everything. It would be okay if we’d be friends.

Well, I think that’s it. Bye!

9:41pm

So when dad came home from work today him Eddie and I went up to the cabin. We drove past Tori’s house and I see Aaron’s atv parked in the yard. So I choke back my sadness and when we get there I empty the water out of the paddle boat. I have to pee so I go back up to the bathroom. Eddie and I were hanging out on the little boat trailer and Eddie sees Tori over at Aaron’s house. And we see them walk over to my house. So I meet Tori. She seems nice and she really wanted to meet me. So yeah. And she can sit like a frog like me! I think that’s pretty awesome! So I show her around my house and we sit in the back room and talk for a little while. Then we played DDR. Aaron actually played! Then they left. It was a good time. I’m glad I got to meet her finally!

<3 Ava Estelle

Present day me: I really enjoyed this entry. It brings out the maturity I had at that age about emotions. But it also pointed out a time when I decided not to rely on others for some emotional support. This can be helpful for some friendships, but overall, I believe necessary for real friendships. Anyway, I liked reading this letter I wrote to Aaron and never gave to him. It helped put things into an order of understanding for me in a way.

June 27, 2008

June 27, 2008

Friday 10:04am

So, it’s the morning after my party. And I’m the only one awake. Sadly. There are a lot of trucks out here and noises and sleeping in a tent isn’t very comfortable. So last night 😊

Delia, Stacey, and Beth got here around 4. We went for a walk down past Tori’s house and as we were walking Aaron came down the street behind us on his atv and passed us. Beth yelled out, “Thanks for saying hi!” he just smiled. So, we walk past Tori’s place and see them talking in her driveway together. Just talking, nothing gross. And everyone is asking me, “Is that her?” and I just nodded my head.

We came back and stood in my driveway for a bit. Then played a few games of BS on the deck while we waited for Paula. Then we went inside and ate some food. Then Paula showed up. We got into our suits and dad took us out on the pontoon boat so we could swim off of it.

Just before we get into the water Andrea calls me and tells me she’s coming also. So, we go swimming for a while and then get out because Bridget was on her way here and we weren’t sure when Andrea was going to show up. So, we come back up here and change back into our clothes, get waters and then Andrea and Bridget show up. I decided to take whoever would want to go on an atv ride. I took Beth and then Stacey, but it ran out of gas in the middle of the yard. So, riding the atvs was done.

So, we go for a walk. We make it to the top of the hill kind of and start talking and tossing my water bottle around. Then Austin comes out and stands there with us. So, we get done playing toss and Austin goes, “I’m going to go get Danny.” Some guy that also lives up here back on the other side of the bird lady’s house. We walk down there, and he isn’t home. So, we walk back and Austin said we can go see their puppies. Aaron comes outside and meets us on the road and says to me, “Ava, do you have enough friends?” I smiled, “Yeah, there are some new people this time.” And they introduced themselves. Then we went to see the puppies. 😊

They were just as cute as before. We just stood behind his house for a while and got bitten up by mosquitoes. Then we moved to his driveway where there were less bugs. He had a radio on the back of his atv so we listened to music. I told him to change it to a certain station and some other people were telling him other stations. He said, “I’ll just listen to Ava, because Ava’s the best.” And I smiled and said, “that’s what I’m here for.” I don’t know if that was really the right thing to say to that. But whatever.

So, after we stood outside for a while we went inside to play some apples to apples. We had to sit on the floor because Meryl was using the table. So, I sit down on the pink chair and Aaron comes and says, “Where should I sit?” and I say, “Sit here,” I think Beth wanted him to sit by her but he sat by me. 😊 “I think I’ll just sit by Ava, she’s the only one who wouldn’t kill me,” he said. So, we played apples to apples. And I was helping him with putting the best red card down.

When it was his turn to judge he had the green card for outrageous, and I put down corn on the cob. I didn’t pester him that hard, I was just being silly but I won it! 😊 he’s like “Fine you can just have it.” In like the middle of the game Austin goes and tries to get Danny again. And we kind of stop playing apples to apples and start reading the cards from the “would you rather” game. Aaron and I keep making small talk every so often. Then Austin shows up with Danny.

Turns out Danny is a year younger than us. And Aaron hadn’t of seen him for a while because when Danny got into the room Aaron stood up and gave him a hug and asked him if he’s lost weight. It was really funny. Then the boys talked with the boys and girls talked with the girls. Aaron, I think, showed Danny everyone but I wasn’t listening. Aaron asked anyone for a cell phone and I gave him mine to use he called Spencer to tell him that Aaron and Austin’s little black boy statue was stolen. So now I have Spencer’s cell number, haha. I’ll probably never call it.

After talking for a while and having Paula and Beth try to get me to go skinny dipping, Aaron, Austin and Danny left. Aaron came up to me and told me they were leaving, and I had the courage to hug him! It was awesome. 😊 I FINALLY got to hug him!

What Stacey said later was “It looked like he clutched on to you.” He had given me a little squeeze. So, they left, and I was like glowing and super high off of hanging out with Aaron. So, we grab a big flashlight and use our phones and walk down the street. I play all my new ringtones and we like jump up and down and sing and dance to them. It was SO fun! We got back, ate some food, and went into the tent and stayed up til 5am!

I ended up falling asleep for about a half an hour to an hour this morning. At like 4:30 me, Beth and Paula walked down the street a little ways because the sun was just rising and there was fog down the road, it was so pretty! Then we got back to the tent and fell asleep. Now it’s 10:01 and already Delia and Bridget left. So, it’s just me, Paula, Beth, Stacey and Andrea. Everyone else is still asleep. I had an awesome summer all nighter! It was much better than I expected.

Now it’s 8:02pm. Here’s what I did today:

At around 11 we all woke up, and Andrea left. So, it was the four of us. We got up and went swimming in the rain. It was only drizzling. And while we were in the water, we took off our suits. We skinny dipped! It was really fun, very free! No wedgies! After swimming we came back up, changed clothes and went for a walk. The road was paved this morning! So, we got to walk on it bare footed. It was still sticky. On the way back we saw Aaron drive over to Tori’s with his mom and he was wearing some really hot red shorts. They were plaid. HOT! Yeah, then we came back inside and chilled in my room.

Newflash: I only want to be friends with Aaron. Since he’s taken, I don’t want to break them up. So, I’ll just be friends with him and see how time goes.

Great night! <3

Ava Estelle

Present day me: This entry is bittersweet now because I’m not friends with anyone who was at this all-nighter anymore. I don’t even talk to any of the guys. I remember this party and how fun and almost electric it was. Everyone got along, and everyone had a good time! Reading this as an adult it gives me comfort.

June 22, 2008

June 22, 2008

Sunday

Well let me write all about this past weekend.

Thursday night the ktown clan came up. Kind of late so they pretty much just got here, and we went to sleep. Then on Friday we all woke up around 8:30-9ish. Us girls played some volleyball, but there was still dew all over the grass, so it was kind of cold and wet. So, we decided to play apples to apples and listen to music. So, I plugged in my ipod speakers and let Gayle manage the music. We then went for a walk into town. Their mom gave Linda $30 because we had to get more than just candy for all the kids. On our walk there Bob had his big white car and almost ran us over, we didn’t know who he was, so we were kind of freaking out. They all started laughing as they passed.

So, we’re walking on the bridge and Gayle wants to get a picture of her and Linda. So, Linda pulls out her camera from the case and the $20 flys out. It went straight into the river, and I stepped on the ten. Gayle went crazy. She called her dad with my phone and told him. I guess he laughed. But anyway, I just got a packet of starbursts and everyone at them all. Gayle ate all of the strawberry banana ones. They were the best kind. So, once we got back we went on the pontoon. Went swimming and tanned a little bit. It was good. Then us four girls paddle boarded back. Then we just pretty much chilled for the rest of the day.

Saturday: summer solstice. We get up and use girls want to go out somewhere like see a movie, go bowling or do whatever. So, we managed to get the moms to take us out for ice cream. I get a chocolate chip cookie dough cone. Before getting ice cream the moms had to stop at the grocery store to pick up some liquor. As we were walking past all the checkouts all the baggers were looking at us. They happened to be all boys. 😊 after visiting town, we just came back and rode the atvs a bunch. And played some board games.

Best part!

So having it be summer solstice dad had a bonfire and Bob shot off fireworks. Earlier in the evening me and Gayle went for a walk down past Tori’s house. And we saw Aaron’s atv there. So, Gayle and me were talking about ways to spy on Tori and Aaron. It was really funny. Back to the bonfire. We had to get two chairs from down by the lake. Me, Meryl and Gayle went down there. Once we got back up, we saw Austin standing by the bonfire. Gayle told him he should go get Aaron and just as we were talking about that we hear Aaron’s atv coming back from Tori’s. But he showed up. And we decided to play sardines. I hid first but on my way to a hiding spot I tripped on a big fricken stump and landed on my chin. It hurt so bad. I ran behind a tree and decided to run across the yard to get away from them, but Eddie got me and I fell to the ground. Then we decided to go inside and we played apples to apples. 10 people total! It was fun! I got to just sit kind of diagonal from Aaron. I won stunning from him. 😊 haha. Then we just talked and the guys flicked bottle caps at each other. It as kind of cool. Austin, Jake and Eddie were on the side with the sliding doors and Aaron, and I were on the other side. Then we started talking again, I showed Aaron my temps. And we talked about driving a little bit. Then we wanted to play a game outside. But we only made it to the deck. And talked some more. Then came back inside, talked more. I asked Aaron what he did today, and he said he went to work, then a junkyard with his dad and he took a nap. He didn’t say anything about going over to Tori’s. But he did mention her. I said I should meet her. He said yeah, that’d be fun. Then they started talking about puppies. Aaron and Austin have a black lab and a husky, and they had puppies. Six weeks old, so at 12:30am we went over to their house and each of us got to hold a puppy. They were just opening their eyes. SO CUTE! So, then we came back here and went to bed. I got up and texted some people, “Guess who I hung out with last night!”

Ava Estelle

Present day me: This was one of the fun times I had with Gayle and Linda. We were a bit older, and we had more of the same interests. It was nice to have a smooth time with her. I remember hanging with Aaron after knowing he had a girlfriend, who lived just down the street. It was a little weird to me, but I figured we were neighbors, he could hang with Eddie if he wanted to as well. I don’t know what he was telling Tori…. It was probably easy for him to come and hang out at my house after being at Tori’s because she couldn’t see my house from hers. He could just pop over, and she thought he was going home.

June 8, 2008

June 8, 2008

Sunday 9:16pm

So, it is officially summer vacation! It’s been okay. The weather has been pretty crappy. Thursday was our last day of school. It was a lot of fun. We went to culvers for lunch, and we saw an old well beloved middle school teacher there! That was awesome!!! After school we went to Andrea’s bonfire and hung out there for a while. Rhonda had her first smore!!! Then Rhonda, Tabitha, Hannah, and Beth came over to my house to sleepover! I showed them behind the neighbor’s house with a path, creek, and bridge. Then we made Hannah a myspace and played Apples to Apples. I won friendly with construction workers! 😊😊 Yeah. We ended up going to bed around 1am. Got up, had pancakes, and drove Rhonda and Tabitha home. We also got to meet Hannah’s new dog! So cute!! Yeah, so the rest of Friday we went up to the lake, I scrapbooked and just chilled.

Saturday, we went to Uncle Ron’s house for his half birthday party. But mom didn’t go. I got to drive for the last 45 minutes home. It was really good. Then today we woke up at the cabin and came home. We went shopping while Eddie was at a birthday party. And just chilled. Yeah, pretty relaxing first few days of summer.

<3 Ava Estelle

Present day me: I remember being so happy we got to see that teacher we all had in middle school. He was known as being so kind, friendly and helpful for many students. Everyone wanted to be in his class! Getting to see him during our last day of our first year of high school was really special. I also remember making a myspace for Hannah. She didn’t have DSL at the time so I told her I’d help her get a myspace and she could check it at my house anytime.